Have you ever been on Instagram and seen all these moms talking about needing balance in their life, and how they have no time for themselves? Or, even worse, you have been scrolling your feed and you see all of these moms who do have it all together- The ones who seem to have found the most perfect balance of mom/family life, work life and, heck, they even have a social life and time to workout. What?! I used to look at these women and think to myself, “Yeah right! There is no way.”
Well, the more I saw this the more it got me thinking that, yes, I may only be seeing the highlight reel of their lives, and what they wanted me to see, but there had to be a way to find a balance of all the things without going insane. So, I set out to find ways to truly have a healthy balance in my life. One that would help me find joy and make me feel like I was living fulfilled. I am here to tell you as a full-time working mom that it can be done and I am going to give you some tips on how to make it happen!
Before I share the tips I have found that work for me, I want to start by saying you have to be flexible, show yourself some grace, and be willing to constantly evaluate and change your life to find balance. It might sound like a juggling act, but I promise, it is really not that difficult.
Okay, so here is the how-to. First, you have to schedule your work time. I used to be the one, and am still guilty from time to time, who had my work email on my phone and would constantly be checking it and responding, even at 9 o’clock at night. I am a teacher, I mean come on. The majority, if not all, of those emails could wait until I got to work the next morning. It is hard enough to be away from your kiddo for 8-10 hours a day while you work, it is only going to add stress if you constantly bring your work home. I am now a firm believer in setting work hours. When I walk out of that building, I put my mom hat on and only handle work emergencies. It has been amazing! My family feels like I am present and not just “home”. So, go delete your work email from your phone right now.
Second, you have to learn time management. Using your time wisely will help you get your work done more efficiently. For example, I used to walk around during my planning period at school and talk to all my teacher friends. Well, then I would end up taking stacks of papers home to grade each night. It broke my heart to hear my daughter say, “Mommy can you play me?” and me have to respond with, “In a minute!” I decided that I would start using that 40 minutes to grade, plan and prepare. It may not seem like much, but 40 minutes a day for 5 days adds up. That is over 3 hours of time that I got back with my family. It was more than worth it!
Third, get up an hour earlier and have some me time. I know! I know! You already feel like you do not sleep enough, and sleep is important. However, this is where you have to decide what is important and prioritize. I run a health and fitness business on the side. So, I use that hour in the morning to get that work done, get my workout in and have some quiet time. When looking at finding a balance I thought about giving my business up, but I realized that it was my me time. It was part of what made me feel so much joy and fulfillment. I just had to figure out how to work it in. Part of finding a feeling of balance is to do what you enjoy. So, I get up an hour earlier. This allows me to be a better mom because I use this time as my me time. Your me time may look different than mine, but you have to find a way to make it happen. Maybe it is not getting up early. Maybe it is staying up 30 minutes later. Whatever it may be, find a chunk of time for you.
Lastly, you need to plan, schedule and organize. If you just go through life waiting on things to happen or barely remembering when you are supposed to be where, then you are always going to feel scattered. A scattered brain makes for a chaotic and stressed out mama. Schedule your workout. Plan a night out with your friends. Get a family calendar and document it all.
Us mamas have to stick together. I promise you that if you do these small tasks then you will be one of the ones people will be looking at saying, “How does she find such a balance?” It really isn’t hard. It is just a matter making those changes and sticking to them.
