Can I be honest for a second? Lean in close because I need to whisper this softly. It’s hard for me to say out loud because I’m not proud of this fact. Are you ready for the truth? Can you handle the truth? More days than I’d like to admit, I’m a terrible mother! Like if they gave out participation trophies to the worst moms on the planet, I’d have a floor-to-ceiling wall of plastic Worst Mom trophies! Hey, at least I participate, I guess.
Just today, I lashed out at my son because I let him go hang with his buddies with the knowledge that he had an orthodontist appointment that I’d need to get him to after his hang time. I knew we were in for a crazy afternoon with a quick turnaround time, but I was trying to be a good mom and said, “Sure you can go hang out with your friends.”
Then he made sure to take his Bible. How could I say no?
Fast forward to the moments when I’m leaving my house and I’m really not sure where I’m going to pick him up. We exchanged a text about his location. He told me the name of a subdivision that I had never even heard of. (We’ve lived in Auburn for 1 year and 5 days.) Then he proceeded to drop a pin on his location using an app that I don’t have on my phone.
More truth bombs – all this while, I’m texting and driving and my temperature is going through the roof! Not my finest moments!
I hit up google maps real quick to find out where the subdivision is and where the “first roundabout” is, which is where he said he was going to be. Guess what? He wasn’t at the first roundabout!
The clock is ticking. My blood is boiling. I’m saying all kinds of things out loud that only my daughter, who was in the backseat can hear.
I call him. No answer.
I mean this kid knows I’m on my way. He’s told me he’s at the first roundabout, which clearly he’s not.
When I call him a second time, he actually answers the phone and says he’s at the pool.
I’ve never been in this neighborhood and this kid has the gall to tell me he’s at the pool like I have this magical ability to know where the pool is! I didn’t even know where the subdivision was!
My response was not nice.
My tone was not encouraging.
My volume was definitely not pianissimo!
I’m sure that all of his friends think I’m a total nut job after I screamed at him through the phone!
There’s no way they didn’t hear me. They probably went home and hugged their moms real tightly, glad my son’s mom isn’t theirs!
I earned my Worst Mom trophy today!
I could write a 10 volume set of books about all the ways I earn my Worst Mom award on the daily!
We spend way too much time on devices and phones and playing Minecraft at my house.
My kids watch lots of TV and to make the situation worse, I’m not great at researching exactly what they’re watching and learning why I shouldn’t let them watch various shows or movies.
I’ve never been the playdate orchestrating mom, unless I really wanted to hang out with the mom.
We aren’t a get-out-and-do kind of family because I’m content to stay home all the time! (I’m trying to do better!)
I’m that mom who makes them drink water at a restaurant because I’m too cheap to pay $2.50 for a carbonated beverage.
Even though I am a terrible mom in too many ways, my kids have managed to turn out fairly well – so far! 
My kids are resilient in ways I’ll never be.
My kids forgive easily and quickly in ways I never will.
My kids are understanding and more aware of the inner workings of our home than I would like them to be.
I may not be the most fun mom and I’m definitely the mom that flies off the handle, especially when I’m overwhelmed and stressed and in unfamiliar situations.
My kids tell the story quite frequently of the day I was driving them home from a swim meet in Tupelo, MS and my friend, Google, took us to someone’s driveway instead of the highway we were supposed to be on.
I cried. I called my husband in absolute frustration. I just wanted to get home and I was wandering in Podunk, MS with no end in sight.
I had a pretty significant meltdown right there in my Kia van in front of my middle two kids! (Ironically, those were the same two kids in my newer Kia van today.)
Maybe they don’t forget so well!
I’m really making myself sound like a real basket case!
Here’s the thing, though. I may be a basket case.
I may be a bit psycho.
(Oh she’s sweet, but a psycho…this song is actually on one of my kids’ Amazon playlists!)
My kids know I’m their biggest cheerleader.
They know I’ll drop whatever I’m doing to meet their needs.
They know I’ll go to the grocery store in the middle of the night to buy supplies and ingredients for their school project that’s due the next morning.
They know I’ll deliver their lunch box to the school office when they’ve left it lying on the steps at home.
They know I’ll be standing on the sideline of the track or XC course cheering them on.
They know I’m the biggest fan of that soccer player with 51 on her jersey.
They know I’ll console their heartaches and disappointments.
They know I’ll drive them all over the state of Alabama to make sure their body is whole.
They know that even though I’m not always super nice or I don’t always respond kindly to them or I may huff and puff quite regularly, that I love them unconditionally.
I’ll gladly accept my Worst Mom Participation trophies and you know who will be the first 4 people I thank as I’m handed that piece of plastic, with tears streaming down my cheeks? Bailey, Maverick, Jenna Beth, and Harper!
I can name a couple of dozen times you not only made sure your kids were where they needed to be but you added a 5th kid to that stress. Thank you for being my carpool buddy!!
I can identify with so many of these things! I think the thing that speaks even louder than perfection would is us knowing our imperfections and our kids seeing we are real people- imperfect like them who need to apologize, ask forgiveness and need Jesus every day- just like them! Thanks for your honest and amusing post!!
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