We’ve all heard the saying before, “When Life Gives You Lemons, Make Lemonade!” It always seems to fly out of someones mouth when you mention a hardship they think isn’t so serious. You roll your eyes and thank the person for their oh so inspiring wisdom. Really, all you wanted to hear was, “Gee that stinks.”
In parenting, someone is always telling you to make lemonade. (There are a lot of bitter lemons when it comes to babies). Instead of mentioning sweet and tart beverages people tell you to “Cherish the time because it won’t last.” This phrase drove me absolutely bananas during the newborn stage. Any time I would mention how long it took for my baby to take her bottle or how I had to lay in bed (awake) for 22 hours a day because she wouldn’t sleep anywhere other than on my chest, it never failed someone somewhere would tell me to enjoy it (cherish it, relish it, take your pick).
Here’s the thing though, I couldn’t. No matter how many times someone told me to make myself some lemonade all I could taste was the bitter lemon it came from. I didn’t enjoy sitting around for hours at a time unable to accomplish anything. I loved my baby more than anything but I was itching to have a somewhat normal life.
We read so many articles and social media posts about how mothers love to sit and hold their babies. How the world can continue to spin around them but they are content staring at those sweet little lips for as long as they can. I. Felt. Terrible. I thought something must be wrong with me. How could everyone else on the face of the earth be content simply existing with their child and all I could think about was how awesome it would be to head to Target?
It took a long time (and some medication) to come around to understanding I’m not a horrible mom. Sitting still wasn’t my thing. I don’t enjoy things hanging over my head and when I decide to do something I want to get it done then. That’s my personality and having a baby didn’t change that. I didn’t enjoy the newborn stage. There I said it, go ahead and prepare the guillotine.
Once I accepted that this stage of parenting wasn’t really my favorite it felt like a weight was taken off my shoulders. I started to appreciate the parts of motherhood I did enjoy and learn to barrel through the rest. I loved reading to my newborn. I loved talking to her and seeing her funny expressions when she discovered her hands. I loved hearing her giggle and make new sounds. I didn’t need to make lemonade. I had some. I simply needed to accept the few bitter lemons that came with it, Now that my daughter is older and down to two naps a day, I find myself holding her a little longer than needed as I rock her. When she wakes up at 5 a.m., I’m excited to bring her to my bed for a snuggly cat nap before we start our day. Ironically, snuggles have become the lemonade and we’ve rolled in a few new lemons.
As I said earlier, babies come with a lot of hardships. They are basically one walking catch-22, constantly changing and evolving which is infuriating (because you just figured out their sleep schedule) and amazing (because those ear piercing squeals have become words). You don’t have to try and the bright side or pretend you love every second of parenting. It’s not honest and you’ll only cause yourself more worry and frustration by trying. Instead, enjoy what do you do. As far as the lemons go? Take some advice from above and remember”This Too Shall Pass.”
